Whiter than Rice

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

WBC: Massive Success in Every Way Possible

Let me put it to you this way:

Asian Countries Participating: 4
Crazy Ultranationalistic Asian Countries Participating: 3
Douchebaggey American Umpire: 1
Number of Years Ichiro! aged: 60*
Final Batting Line of GREATEST AMERICAN HERO: .150/.393/.600/.993
BHK Self-destruct innings: 1
Alex Rodriguez blamed for loss not his fault: Positive
Adam Stern hitting for the cycle: 1
Teams in Final that the United States has beefed with in the last 100 years: 2
Shooting Wars: 0

Fantastic Tourney

Fun was had by all. Except for BHK. Screw him.

Few random thoughts:

1. Osagawara - Despite rugged good looks and great 1B defense, didn't do as much at the plate.

2. Nishioka - Brings out the inner giggling school girl in yours truly. Does EVERYTHING well: hits for contact, has decent power when he gets a hold of one (Hello Mr. KKKKOOOOOOOOOOO), can outrun a bloody gazelle, huge range at 2B... and that push bunt today? TEXTBOOK

3. Kawasaki - stunk today. Makes 2 errors today... tries to bunt for a basehit twice... both times snuffed out by the D. Of course, when he has to lay down a SAC bunt, he fails. Nishioka-san bails him out, and then bails himself out with that great bit of baserunning coming home.

4. Ichiro! - good contact throughout the tournament... had a lot of hard line drives by infielders. Will learn not to talk as much shit.

5. Uehara - I think we can put him in that "Roger Clemens/Curt Schilling" "family" of pitchers now. Great control, WILL not give up the walk, can strike out guys, good splitter... not as much life in that fastball, and not as douchey, but he can pitch.

6. Fukudome - from .100 tourney hitter to instant National Hero. Oh-san is a genius

7. Oh-san doesn't know what he's doing

What does Bobby Valentine have to do, send a bloody memo with his players?
a) Fujita: 45 appearences, 38 IP... what does Oh-san do? Leaves him to face a second righty... get hammered.

b) Watanabe: Don't use against too many lefties... leaves him in against a bunch of lefties.

What was Oh-San doing pulling Matsuzaka in the 5th anyway? He was cruising! Everybody knows you can leave Matsuzaka in there for like 15 innings!


Japan’s leading hitter Ichiro Suzuki had fired up South Korea with his pre-tournament comment that he wanted to show the rivals they would never beat Japan “for at least 30 years.”


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